THE PIRATE A salty seaman and an old pirate were in a smoky pub swapping tales of their adventures on the high seas. The seaman noticed that the pirate had a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch. The seaman asked, "So how did you get yer peg leg?" The pirate replied, "'Twas a bad storm at sea when I was swept overboard into a school of man-eatin' sharks. Just as me men was pullin' me out, a shark bit me leg off..." "Aye" said the seaman. "And what about yer hook?" "Well," reminisced the pirate, "'Twas the day we boarded an enemy ship and got into a bloody sword fight with their swashbucklers. In the heat of the battle, me hand got cut off by an enemy's sword..." "Arrgh!" remarked the seaman. "How'd you get your eyepatch?" "'Twas a seagull dropping that fell into me eye..." replied the pirate. "You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?" the sailor asked curiously. "Aye," replied the pirate, "'Twas me first day with the new hook..."